I like turtles

I just watched an episode of Scrubs where the janitor got married. You know, the thing I like about Scrubs is that no matter how wacky or random or stupid the antics may be, a message is always thrown right into your face. And a pretty big message at that.

Like the episode I just watched went and threw this sucker to me : Love is capable of changing you, whether you like it or not. And no matter what, it's going to be a good change.

Got me thinking (hence this post, duh), have my past relationships changed me for the better or am I just the same crappy person I was a few years ago?

Quick recap :

Relationship #1 - Started lying to my parents for his sake. Don't think it was a good change.

Relationship #2 - Started being more and more judgmental, materialistic, picky and downright cruel. Not good change.

Relationship #3 - Started giving up on believing there is such a thing as real love altogether. Well, isn't this a happy thought?

So anyway, here I am today. I went from a a 15 year old girl who would jump over the moon with joy if her dearly beloved gave her a bar of chocolate, to an 18 year old girl who would gladly burn all romance novels and chick lits because of their sickening happy endings and perfect little romantic scenarios.

But back in a little corner of my mind, there's this question. Maybe I just haven't found the right person to change me? This feeling of boundless love has to be real. I know it is because I've seen it. I've seen people change for me. I've seen the way they love endlessly. That's what makes things so difficult and imperfect for me. I have yet to find somebody who I am going to love endlessly. I have to find someone I myself love, and who loves me back. In that real way, not that stupid meaningless "I love you because you're so hot/pretty and I just wanna fuck you" way.

I think Scrubs left something out in their message. It should be - Someone you really love is capable of changing you, whether you like it or not. And no matter what, it's going to be a good change.