Question.

You ever get that feeling of inadequacy that's so powerful that you feel like all you deserve to do is to just sit in a corner alone, shrivel up into dust and get blown away?
Just keep out of everyone's way because all you are is a nuisance. You're the bug on the windscreen, you're the mosquito bite during a sunny day, you're the piece of lizard shit on the clean wall.
And all you can do is hope to shrink into the distance and that nobody notices that you're gone. Just so that everyone gets their peace of mind and nobody's miserable because of you.

But sometimes when you're trying to do just that, that still doesn't cut it because instead of doing what you're expected to do (which wasn't good enough to begin with), you're doing nothing. Which is a bad thing.
Then things get so demanding and so tense that all you want to do is open your mouth and scream your lungs out but you can't. Because that's just not the right thing to do. The right thing, (or the expected thing) to do is to keep quiet and listen to how wrong you are in a persons eyes.
And so you press your lips together and do everything you can to hold in that stream of words struggling to flow out. You start taking deep calming breaths, you start clenching your fists to keep the anger in, you wedge your feet together to avoid a foot from springing out and kicking something.

Then when the demands are over, you feel so exhausted from keeping in all that anger that you just want to close your eyes, fall asleep and forget. But you can't.
All you want is a clear head and conscience, but there's so many things running through your head. So you wade through the day, head congested with guilt and anger, hoping with all your heart for better tomorrows.

You ever feel like that?